I TOO AM WAITING {personal words}

Wednesday, November 14, 2018

do you see the quiet that lives in my soul
the part that is afraid to tell you i'm not okay
because i don't want to see you try to fix something
that can't be fixed by you

i'm sure you've noticed a shift in my eyes
they wander searching for significance
the kind no one has but God himself
but even when He is standing in front of me
i can't admit i need the help

i've watched the trees lose their leaves
they tremble all winter long waiting 
for the day they are strong enough to
grow what they once lost back

like the trees, i too am waiting

i am waiting for the day
when i am strong enough to grow again
the day when my spirit blooms like the flowers
and the colors inside of me don't only shine
on the inside but radiate on the outside too

until then i tell myself that it'll get better
that people can support but never fix
that i must be the one to self-sooth my quietness
to listen to the thoughts walking in my head
and to keep waiting for the season

you, my dear, can keep walking by my side
as i hold on
while God keeps watch

and i tell myself to be patient through the quiet 

NOTE: I really want my morning to be longer. When I get in a good writing mood and find a home within the words it's so hard to tear myself away and get on with my daily responsibilities. Today, classes. I feel very disconnected from the blogging world. It's been a while since I've had time to read everyone's blogs. Comment and I'll make sure to catch up with you! Miss you all. and as always thank you for your love and support on my blog.


  1. love the line about looking for significance that only God has. like yikes. convictEDDDDD. we search for perfection in all these earthly things, forgetting that Christ is the only one who can actually satisfy that ache in our smol hearts. get it. x

    1. Thank you for these words Cally! It's an easy thing to forget but a wonderful thing to remember.

  2. this is amazing. and I know how it is to feel disconnected. you are not alone <3

  3. I loved reading this Vanessa as I always do for your words. :)

    Nabila | Hot Town Cool Girl

  4. This post is so beautiful!! I really can relate, as always you blow me away with your talent with words!

    xx Esther

    p.s I'm coming out with a christmas album for a mission fundraising project, would you be interested in being part of my blog tour? Its alright if you're too busy or whatever. You can shoot me an email (e5eckstine@gmail.com) if you're interested.
    Thanks girl!! keep being awesome :)

    1. Thank you, thank you! I was hoping some of you might be able to relate.

      Oh beautiful! I'll email you for more information and we can talk about it.

  5. This. This so much. I feel like you've looked in and seen the words on my heart <3

  6. Wow, this. I have no words. xx


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