Thursday, December 31, 2015

Finding Myself in 2016


Leaving who I was in 2015 behind to rediscover a better person in 2016.

Earth has rotated 365 times around its self and has circled once around the sun. A year isn't a lot of time when you think about it like that. The time we get to stand strong on earth isn't long, yet a year can feel like eternity. Memories are what keep us together throughout the year, hold onto them tightly.

2016 will be a time to grow, learn, and become who I want to be. It will be focused around becoming a person I adrimre. Graduating is on so many of our minds yet the bigger picture hasn't hit. After we graduate we have the capability to become whoever we desire and do whatever makes us content. Let us all find our purpose this year. 2016 is here, and more than welcomed.

I want to discover who I am this year. My focus will be set at finding myself, I am not lost, but I know I am not found. Me, myself, and I are very important this year.

Love,
Me, myself, and I

Friday, December 18, 2015

Christmas Wishlist

Quick thank you for keeping my page views 100 plus each day! It makes me smile when I see that people are reading what I write and that maybe I am helping/inspiring them. Again, thank you! It means so much to me! I hope all of you are having a good holidays! I know I am. I have been hanging out with friends and today is my last day of school. Thank god.

I went above and beyond in fitness after eating crap yesterday. I might or might not have skipped spanish in order to go to another weight training class with my friend Isabelle. Boy did we have fun while getting sweaty. One hour and thirty minutes in the first class and did it a second time with Isabelle it was great. I almost want to lay on the library floor and sleep.

BREAK!!! I am officially THIRTY minutes away from being on a much needed break! It's going to be a fun break, hell yes. I plan on doing a christmas type of activity each day! Need to remind myself to share the christmas decorations I have in my room with you all! Can you tell I am excited?!!!!!

This morning, let's have a heart to heart for a minute. This morning I was at the schools track and I looked into the clouds. This overpowering feeling of thankfulness washed over me. I am so blessed to be in this world and to have good people in my life.

As a thank you check out this playlist! (Sophia, thanks for the tutorial) 



Thank you again!
Love,
Vanessa

Monday, December 14, 2015

6 Words


"She wanted to hold her dreams."

6 word contest by Elly. A little last minute, I know, but this is something I wanted to do. Such a cleaver contest!

Little update: 
I am officially on the dance team! How exciting right? It's final, I am a Sunflare and I am out to win State. We have our first group meeting thing today, and it's going to be fun. In school we got into groups to find out a theme for state. We have been putting puzzle pieces together all day!

Thursday, December 3, 2015

The Girl Behind The Blog














I am the girl behind this blog. I have put thought into every post, typed every word, redesigned my blog more than a few times, cried while spilling out emotions, and laughed at the jokes I typed. BUT there is so much more to be than JUST the girl behind the blog. I am more than the girl you read about every now and then, I am me.

What you can't tell by reading this blog is how messy and frustrating my like can be. My blog is the one place where I can be neat and present myself in a put-together way. I love that my blog is the one place I know will always be how I like it. It's like a safe place to me because my world that looks past this blog is so much more complex, but you would never be able to tell.

At times, my life is confusing, busy, un-clear, crazy, hectic, unorganized. There is so much going on that the readers don't know. All they see is a girl who spends way too much time blogging about everyday things. Everyday things include: Struggles, worries, concerns, wonder, and other things alike. My life is not as put together as it seems and my blog deceives that fact dramatically.

I am the girl behind the blog.

Friday, November 27, 2015

Catching Up With V: Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving weekend! It started off with a run into Portland, but this picture was too cute not to post first! We took this picture on thanksgiving morning after we did our hair and makeup. We were in PJS until dinner. When dinner came around we got into nicer clothes.

Running in Portland was something I did before my dad picked my sister and I up. I had time and I was not going to wait in the car so I ran across the Hawthorne bridge. This is a picture of the city from the bridge! I am always going to love Portland. <3

First Thanksgiving I have spent with my dad since my parents divorce. Went to my dads house on Wednesday and will be going back Saturday! Thanksgiving was good for the most part. I'm not a big Thanksgiving person. I could care less for mashed potatoes, stuffing, green bean casserole, rolls, and other goodies. Time spent together all day was more fun then eating dinner. We watched a lot of Jimmy Falon things on youtube click here for a video. We also... Actually I spent a lot of the time before dinner on my blog reading everyone's posts.

Black "Friday" was pretty fun. I was in need of jeans and yoga pants and found exactly that for an amazing price! If you're looking for good yoga pants that aren't as expensive as Nike's I recommend Old Navy active wear. THIS IS NOT A SPONSERED MESSAGE. I have been a happy buyer of Old Navy's active wear ever since it came out. Can't tell you how much I like their sports clothes. I might do a small black Friday haul post...maybe!

Friday the 27th was the day of my dads birthday. Pancakes were made in the morning for the birthday boy. We made so many heart and ice cream cone shaped pancakes. (We: My dad's girlfriend, her son, and my sister) The pancakes and eggs were a great start to the day! And hello, look at how cute they are. 

Before cake and presents, we all decided that going on a walk would be a great idea. It was chilly, but I got a chance to workout after doing nothing exercise wise on Thanksgiving. Our walk (my run) was way long. We got lost and spent a lot of time trying to figure out where to go. We made it back, and I feel like I am going to be sore tomorrow, thanks to all the mini hills! Good for me!

Dinner after our long walk (my run!) was great. That's all I have to say. I am amazing card maker if you can't tell. It was a good Thanksgiving week! Happy to have spent it with my dad even if the minion is kinda annoying. :) Little kids are cute. Sometimes. Grateful to spend time with my dad over Thanksgiving and his birthday. I think I said that already but who cares?

Hope everyone had an awesome thanksgiving. Let me know what you did in the comments!
<3,
Vanessa

Friday, November 20, 2015

Gratitude Tag


With thanksgiving coming up, the reminder that we should be grateful for what we have, I thought it would be a neat idea to come up with a tag about gratitude. Focus a little less on the eating and more on the actual meaning.

What is gratitude?
It is the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

Often times we forget to show gratitude to one another. Our everyday life struggles get in the way of focusing on what we have and what we can do to show appreciation to one another. Thanksgiving isn't the only time to be reminded of what we are grateful for. Like the saying "You don't know what you have until you lose it." we need to be reminded of the people and things that are important to us.

With that, I give you the Gratitude Tag! Unlike tags that are centered around the things about thanksgiving (food and black Friday) this is a tag you can do any time of the year.

1. What is your favorite quote or verse that reminds you to be grateful? 
This is the day the lord has made. We will rejoice and be glad in it-Psalm 118:24
I like this verse because it reminds me of two things. I need to be grateful for the lord and all the things he has put in my life as well as being grateful for each and every day, good or bad.

2. Who are you grateful for? 
I am grateful for a lot of the people in my life. When I think of who I am grateful for my family instantly comes to mind, my mother especially. She is one of the biggest influences in my life and has made me an amazing person. I am grateful for my friends as well.

3. What life events are you grateful for?
I had a really difficult freshman and sophomore year, it was really horrible. I am grateful for the struggles I had then because they lead me to finding out who I am. Without those hard two years, I have no idea what kind of person I would be. Looking back on those two years now I can see that they helped me become a person I love.

4. What is something you are grateful for but often times don't think about?
Can I answer food to this? I could... I don't know I am asking myself hard questions. Music. Okay I know that is kind of like saying food but I don't really think about how grateful I am for music all the time. It's there and I appreciate it.

5. What are you going to do to show people your gratitude towards them?
Something that I want to do is thanking people more often, not for things like passing me the pepper, but being there when I need them in my life. Thanking friends for sticking with me through the hard times and family for never letting me down.

I tag:
Shelby- Every Bit of Lovely 
Elisabeth- a flyleaf
Sophia- Someplace in the Mist 
Oliva- summer of 1999
Vivian- Day- Dreamer, Night-Thinker 
and
YOU! <3

Much love to my readers,
Vanessa

Sunday, November 15, 2015

Dream Inspired Poetry



The hug I remember crystal clear 

The way those blue eyes held me steady

The way I held him and he accepted my comforting 
The way he didn't let go
and
The way I didn't want him to feel pain

Laying down we held each other in our eyes
Never looking away
Gazing into the eyes of each other was more than physical contact could ever be

Blue eyes peeking into my soul
Brown eyes peering back to his 

Eyes holding me steady as I am acting as the stronger person

Even if I know I will crumble into pieces when he's gone... 

<3,
Vanessa

Monday, November 9, 2015

A Few Thoughts:

Saturday, November 7


Sometimes I just like to sit down and type something. It doesn’t have to be anything special, it just has to stratify the need to write. Sitting in my room listening to music and typing something on my laptop is my idea of a relaxing time. That’s what I am currently, but instead of writing on the blog layout I am typing on word since there is no WiFi at home. It’s okay though, I’m pretending to be on blogger.


What I should be doing is studying for an anatomy test, that’s not happening obviously. I just want to hear the clicking on a keyboard while I ponder life and pretend I don’t have a thousand other things to be doing at this moment.


I love relaxing music. I have a playlist full of relaxing music. Looking for you Again by Matthew Perryman Jones is playing and I am in love with this song. It’s such a sweet song. I hope the man I love loves me this much. “I hope I die with you in my mind”... I feel like I am going to melt.


The man I love. It’s such an unfamiliar term. Not very often do I think of the one who will love me as much as I love him. Of course I have those moments that every teenage girl has where she wants a guy to take her to all the dances but, when you think of the man you will marry it’s completely different. I have no idea how to explain how different it is compared to the love you give to people now.


The scary thought is that I’m 18 in a few years I might be married. I would have a husband, a job, a house to call my own, my life would be more independent, and other grown up things. I think of myself reading this in a few years. I wonder whether I will be able to say yes to any of the things I think up of now. A house? Good job? Happy life? Strong faith? A husband? Pets? Gives me the chills to think that 25 year old me might be reading this, correction, will be reading this. Maybe them you, as in future me, can help me explain the whole man I love thing.


Well this post went a long ways. No kidding I have been sitting here for about two-ish hours. Time really flies when writing. 697 words right now. Easy to keep clicking on the keys that write out the ideas in my mind. I think I will be forever in love with the sound of typing. 6:16pm my mother is yelling at me for being in my room for to long. She demands that I go down stairs.
<3,
Vanessa

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

10 Reasons You're Still a Kid at Heart

You may be old, but that doesn't mean you don't act like a kid sometimes. You don't want to grow up and have responsibilities, please spare me the extra work. Being a kid is so much better and you intend on being a kid for as long as you can,  even if you're not aware of that. Here is how you know you're a kid at heart:

1. You have stuffed animals in your room- And you can't understand why others don't have any, common who doesn't love stuffed animals?

2. You easily get along with kids- It's a given that you and little kids get along well. They're fun, your fun! You and children like playing the same games!

3. You will put away your phone to play hide and seek, dress-up, barbies, legos, ect.- You hear that someone is playing on of these games and you instantly have to join.

4. You still make a fuss about eating veggies- "EWW, WHAT ARE THESE?... Do I have to eat them?!"

5. You love your birthday- and you still want to have a birthday party just so that you receive more presents.

6. You still think that 20 dollars a lot of money- You feel like you're rich when you get 20 dollars from your mom to spend.

7. You say, "When I grow up..."- You might be a grown up already but you sure don't think you are.

8. You think crossing the street is scary- Stop, look both ways, then look both ways again, and cross... no, wait! I think that's a car... okay now it's safe to RUN! Getting across the street safely is the best feeling ever.

9. You hate ordering for yourself at restaurants-  You always wish you didn't have to be the grown up and order your own food instead of telling your mom what you want then having her order.

10. You laugh when someone farts or burps- It's just the funniest thing and your immature self can't help but laugh to embarrass them!
<3,
Vanessa 
(I'm a kid at heart, obviously! Are you?)

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Staying Healthy

It's so hard to be healthy. I had it together a while ago then got lazy and careless. I need to fix this. With that being said, I am writing on my blog to help me gain focus on eating healthier.

So why is it so hard to eat healthy? 
We are influenced by the people around us and society. Society advertises foods that aren't good for your body and it becomes easy to fall into their trap when all of your friends are eating processed foods that are high in salt, sugar, and fat. Eating healthy isn't nearly as advertised as eating unhealthy. It's really unfortunate.

I believe because of these two reasons (the people around us and advertisement) people have a really difficult time eating healthy, myself included. There are so many other factors of why it is hard to stay healthy, but to keep this brief I quickly pointed out these two reasons.

What can I do? 
There are a lot of things you can do to eat healthy. One of the easiest ways to stay healthy is to say no to fast food. Fast food is one of the worst foods you can eat, staying away from these foods is a great start. You can also stay away from as many processed foods as possible. This is a little harder to do, but it is super helpful one you get it down. Remember to eat lots of fruits, vegetables, grains, and meats. Don't forget water!

If your like me a post saying what your going to do about your health may help too! It's all about what works for you.

My plan: 
I want to stay away from as many prosseced foods as possible, eating more fruits and veggies and especially drinking water. Since the holidays are coming up it will be difficult to stay away from sugary good and unhealthy meals but my plan for this is to only have a cheat meal if I'm out with friends, at a family gathering or something social. Even then I need to remember to keep things in moderation... I make it sound like I'm going to starve myself... Trust me I won't!

I apologize for this rambly kind of post, hopefully you learned a thing or two. Be looking forward to my next post, it should be an enjoyable post! Have a lovely week!
<3,
Vanessa

Sunday, October 18, 2015

Catching up with V

It's been a little over ten days since I have written about what is going on in my life. Oh and look at that! I'm doing another post with the title catching up with V! That's exciting because I rarely use the same title more than once unless it's an update. Still thrilled with my new update title, if you haven't noticed.


Nothing too exciting is going on in school except for the fact that I am the only girl in my weight training class. It's a little out of my comfort zone, but I should be used to it relatively soon. I have also studied for my anatomy test that I took on Thursday, got a good score on it, so I'm happy. I noticed that when I study I always have all my papers neatly around me so I can access them all without having to flip through everything. Talk about time-saving!


I also went to two the pumpkin patches on Friday. One is a smaller family owned pumpkin patch where they grow the pumpkin instead of buying them in large quantities like commercial patches... if you know what I mean. We bought some pumpkins there and then went to the commercial pumpkin patch to take pictures.



Sushi! I'm not sure anyone knows how excited I get to see sushi in the fridge. I love sushi, half the people I know don't like it and I don't understand, hello this is my true love. Healthy and really yummy! 


 A particular room in the beach house with green walls and two comfy couches with light green walls, is my favorite place to relax. As I sit there in awaiting the early morning sun, the smell of sand drifts through the room. The large windows, which allow you to see outside, transform from a still gray to a vivid orange. Birds that were once asleep in their nests start to sing a morning song as they beginning their day. I sit there sinking into a blue couch with a velvet blanket in hand as I wait for the day to arise.


Right now I am currently at the beach house! It's cloudy and it's been sprinkling on and off, but it's really nice. What's funny is I wrote a small paragraph about the beach house and later that day my I was told we were heading to the beach house! This is the perfect get away from school, and the a nice way to unwind. Other than getting barely any sleep (Thank you, person snoring) It has been pretty relaxing. 


What else has gone on... honestly I can't think of .... Oh wait! So last Friday (October, 9th) I didn't have school and went to Honey Toast with a few of my friends. We spent a total of about three hours talking and eating, I'm pretty sure that we might have annoyed the employees it's, fine though, we had a great time catching up and I hope I see them all again very soon for two of them are in college now.


Now, I think that's all the life updates I have.... wait.... yep, that's it!
<3,
Vanessa

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

A Weekend I Won't Forget

Emotions were shed this weekend. The good kind and the bad kind.

I went to my dads house for the weekend. I haven't been there in a few weeks and it's always weird gong to his house when I haven't been there in a while. It started to become odd when my dad and his girlfriend moved in together. I am used to not having him around in my life (living with him) but, I am not used to going to his house and having his girlfriend and her son with him. It's always been my sister, dad, and I hanging out and I could do whatever I want. With his girlfriend and her son around it's like I'm not free to do whatever I want. It's not all bad but it's different, it's the kind of different I am not used to just yet.

Saturday was a fun day, putting aside the headache I had all day. My sister and I stayed at my dad's house while he and his girlfriend went to the zoo. When they came back they picked my sister and I up then we all went to Costco, the airport, and an Asian market. The Asian market was pretty fun because of all the different kinds of foods they sell. Later that night we tried some Asian fruits we have never had before. This was the fun part of my weekend, trying different foods I didn't think I would like. Surprisingly I did like the fruits.

Sunday was spent driving to a cemetery that was two and a half hours from where I live. I "slept" a lot of the time we were in the car. Sleeping in the car is always difficult, the noise, being bumped around, and sunlight kissing your eyeballs when all you want is a dark calm space to drift off. Who ever thought cars would be good for sleeping.... why?

The cemetery we drove to was interesting. It's a natural burial ground which means they bury people and pets in the simplest way. It's a huge forest with an amazing view. It's really hard to explain exactly what they do, but the link will be after this paragraph if you want to take a look at it. We went there in hopes of finding a spot for my dog to be buried in after she passes away, she's got a while to go, but we are prepared now. Clarification: She is still alive, just to clear that. Link to White Eagle 

Going to this place and walking around where many people's bodies are resting was not easy for me. The fact that my dog will be there too did not make it any easier. I shed many tears for this place is unlike all other cemeteries. The feeling you get while standing in the middle of the forest with many souls around is overwhelming. I don't know if I will ever get over the feeling.

Today is Tuesday, October the 6th two days since I was at the cemetery. In class, this morning our math teacher told us she had some bad news. Natalie who went to our school, who had been fighting cancer for five years passed away last night.

There are no words to explain how much this hurts.
But,
What I can say is appreciate the people you have around you and keep your loved ones in your heart.
<3,
Vanessa

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Theme Songs For Ages

Ever since I was about 15 I started matching songs to the age I was. It's fun because it was like your age had and you had a theme song. I wanted to share a few of these songs with you. 


14- More Beautiful You by Jonny Diaz "Little girl 14 flipping through a magazine" 

15- 15 by Taylor Swift- "Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you"

16- Sixteen going on Seventeen by The Sound of Music- "You are 16 going on 17"

17- Dancing Queen by Mamma Mia- "Dancing queen young and sweet only 17"

18- She Will be Loved by Maroon 5- "Beauty queen of only 18"

19- Dancing In The Minefields by Andrew Petersen- "Well, I was 19, you were 21. The year we got engaged. And everyone said we were much too young. But we did it anyway."

21- 21 by Hunter Hayes- "Baby, kids on the run. Gonna party like we just turned 21"

22- 22 by Taylor Swift- "I don't know about you but I'm feeling 22"

23- Thinking Outloud by Ed Sheeran- "And baby my heart can still fall as hard at 23"

If you know an age that matches to a song make sure to let me know in the comments and I'll add it! Oh and happy October 1st! 
<3,
Vanessa 

Saturday, September 26, 2015

Fall, No Internet, and Hard Work

Fall is here! Aren't we all excited that it's officially (marked by the calendar) here. It still doesn't feel like fall just yet, but I know it will soon! I love fall when its in full swing. Going to pumpkin patches and no-school-November is my favorite thing ever. Plus listening to my fall playlist!

I've read a lot of fun posts on fall and I couldn't help but write about it too. I think everyone gets excited for a new season and its great.

Fall started the 23rd and ever since that date I have been sick. It's funny becuase I am drinking all this tea and bundling up trying to get better, when I realized that all this is making fall feel like fall. Forgetting the weather, it's like early 70s here. As weird as this sounds being sick the first few days of fall isn't all that bad.

Something that is bad is no internet at home. We disconnected the internet Thursday the 24th and its driving me crazy. I know this is very bad becuase we shouldn't be so attached to the internet, but it's senior year and I have stuff to get done. It'll be a challenge at first. My phone battery drains quickly if I leave data on too. Why me?

HOWEVER, the plus side of this is having more time to do stuff. Instead of wasting time on Instagram I'll study or do something productive instead. It's not all bad and distance from your phone can be a good thing to.

So far senior year has been a lot of work. Always homework and I can not slack off. I need those last few credits to graduate and I'm going to get them. My hard work will pay off.

I think that's enough of a rant about the fall and other things going on in my life for now. Also, this is being typed on my phone so there are probably a few typos sorry about that. Thank you for taking the time to read!
<3,
Vanessa


Wednesday, September 23, 2015

First 3 Weeks at School

Week 1 (September 9-11): AHH! What is wrong with my schedule?! My biology class isn't there, I have too many early releases, and there are no fun elective classes! It's too early in the morning to solve all this!

Week 2 (Sept. 14-18): Everything is okay, my schedule is fixed and I can deal with not having fun electives. Wait, why do I have so much homework? Why does anatomy have to be so complicated, I thought it would be easier. I'm going to bed once I finish homework. 

Week 3 (Sept. 21-25): I am so D-O-N-E with senior year, but I need to graduate. 

This is how the first three weeks have been for me. It's been crazy. I'm not used to waking up at 5:30 in the morning to leave the house at 7 or being on a strict school schedule. These past weeks have been extremely busy for me. I have to get back into the habit of school. 

Writing 120 has me writing so many papers already, I didn't think it would be this much work. I'm just glad I didn't take 121 I would have been dead by now. Writing is not my strong suit and apparently neither is anatomy. These are the two classes I am worried about the most at the moment. 


Graduation is a ways away, but this is what will be keeping motivated throughout the year. Everything I do this year is going towards graduating I can't wait. Right now, finishing high school is a weird thought, but it will come soon. I have to work hard this year to achieve that goal. 
<3,
Vanessa

Sunday, September 20, 2015

4 Reasons Nature is Calming

1. It's quiet-  Nature allows you to think without the interruptions of the city sounds. It is still and silent, and that is the perfect setting for thinking and clearing your mind. 


2. Nature is beautiful- No questions about how beautiful nature is, from the huge trees that seem to touch the sky to the little flowers that are friends with the bugs. Nature is complex yet simple which is perfect for the eyes. 


3. More O2- Because you are surrounded by trees, you receive more oxygen. Fresh air does amazing things for you and the forest has cleaner air which will make you feel great! Fact: A single mature tree can absorb carbon dioxide at a rate of 48 lbs./year and release enough oxygen back into the atmosphere to support 2 human beings source


4. It's our home- Humans have lived on Earth for about 200,000 years and when we first started living here we lived in nature. There were no houses, cities, or cars, we lived in the wild and so nature is hardwired into who we are. 

Have a good week! 
Note: I am having my internet disconnected, I don't know for how long but just wanted to mention it since I won't be commenting on everyone's blogs as much as I usually do. I will try to post and comment as often as I can. (:
<3,
Vanessa 

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Reflecting on Summer

I can't believe it is September already! The countdown to school has started there are exactly eight days left until I start my senior year! Where did summer go? It feels like it was just the first day of summer vacation, cliché I know, but really. This summer was definitely different from previous summers.

I got my first official job at Terra Nova, working in the garden of a school from seven in the morning until noon, Monday through Thursday. The job wasn't easy, but it also wasn't hard. The people I worked with made it a lot more bearable. For the first month, I had the job I worked for three hours then went to a math recovery class... yep... I failed math. Then for a month this summer every Saturday I was working at a blueberry field. This is the 4th summer I have been doing that.The first half of my summer was very busy as you can see.

Until about mid-July, I had no time to really go anywhere or do anything. Once work was over with I had time to visit with friends of mine and go places like the beach and the river. I also got time to Netflix binge, read, cook, run, and spend time with my sister. We went to Portland to explore a few times which is always fun. Throughout the whole summer, I have been going to dragon boating practice, our team is preparing for a race we have on the 12th and 13th of this month. Hopefully, all that work pays off.

Summer's been good, I guess this is what they call a busy summer. I wish I had more time to go exploring, but you don't always get your choice. I think I am about ready to see what the school year has in store for me.

♥,
Vanessa

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Abby and the Pens

Lately, I have been talking with Abby from Abby and the Pens, her blog isn't too well know yet but if you guys would check out her blog that would be great. Abby's blog is full of amazing sketches and has a creative vibe. Here is an illustration she did for me! Check out her blog here

Sunday, August 23, 2015

Catching Up With V

... Not Catching Up With ME but Catching Up With V. The two sounded similar and I thought I needed a better post title for my random and uncalled for update posts!

Something funny that happened to me was leaving my phone at my mom's friend's house on the 14th. We had just finished cleaning after dinner when we decided to go to a huge cemetery that has a view of the whole city below. I didn't think too much about my phone, but got home and realized where I left my phone. It's funny how dependent you are on your phone.

Barefoot in the graveyard above the city we all decided to play tag. The wind was blowing, the sun was set and we were all out of breath. The wind played with my hair as I chased the children running every which way. We were all laughing having the time of our lives and it seemed like a moment you read in a book. 


My grandma visited for a few days, August 18-21, from North Carolina. It was really great seeing her, the last time I saw her was four years ago so, it was great to catch up. On Tuesday, we picked her up from the airport around 9:00 pm, she was so tired that we took her directly to her hotel, she needed to rest. Every day after that, my sister and me stayed with her at her hotel and swam in the pool they had there, I got so tan from that! 

The thought of school is starting to enter my mind more and more. I have two weeks and a half until school starts... Senior year, here I come! The thought of school scares me a little right now because I don't want summer to end. 

Today, I have turned off my phone in hope that I can unravel and spend some time doing things I enjoy. Blogging being one of them! I have started reading, The Curious Incident of  the Dog in the Night-Time, It's a fantastic book so far!

Songs I'm grooving to: 
Little White Lies, Florrie
Eighteen, Dive In
Dancing With Myself, The Knocks

❤,
Vanessa

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Dwelling & Worrying

Lately, I've been thinking about the past and the future more than I want to, it's getting to the point where I know I am overwhelmed about it and it needs to stop. Thinking about the good memories in the past is perfectly fine, but when thinking about the past becomes a playback of things that you don't want to think about it's uncontrollably irritating. The future has similar but different problems, many unknown possibilities which lead to stressed thinking.

My past has been full of great memories, really good memories that I think about all the time, I am grateful for those memories. But my past also has bad memories that I don't care to re-visit, yet somehow they find their way back to me. Memories of failure, self- disappointment, frustration, unclear thinking, and more that come back to me one way or another.

The future has too many possibilities; possibilities that become overwhelming. That's what gets to me when I think about the future, endless unknown possibilities good or bad. I try to just go with the flow of things but when I lay down in the darkness of the night I unconsciously wonder then worry about what can happen.

I'm writing this in hope that what has been in my head for a while now will slowly drift away and leave me in peace. That all my mistakes will be forgiven, not by others but by myself. Hoping that the future will be untouched until it becomes present.

I need to live in the moment and stop dwelling and worrying about things that can not be changed.

Vanessa 

Thursday, August 6, 2015

How To Dream Journal

How to Dream Journal:
(Sleep is Key)
Dream journaling is actually is actually quite simple, all you have to do is get a notebook and write what you dreamt about in it. When dream journaling, make sure to write down the date of the night you dreamt. (Ex. If it is the morning of the 5th write down the night of the 4th) Then, write down your dream, try to include as many details and emotions as possible. When finished writing your dream down I find it really helpful to underline keywords. Those words could be colors, objects, people, places, or something that reoccurs often. Lastly, this is optional, you can write down how you feel about having this dream.

The hard part in dream journaling is getting into the habit of remembering your dreams. I know that many people find it hard to remember what they dream about, I believe this is because of two reasons. One, you may be getting woken up in an unpleasant way or two, you woke up and rushed to check your phone.

To remember what you dreamt about you must tell yourself that you want to remember your dreams. When you wake up, don't make any sudden movements (jumping out of bed, reaching for your phone, running across the room to turn your alarm off) just lay there and think about dreams. Recalling what you dreamt about first thing in the morning is the key to success, and then of course writing it down. The more you write down your dreams, the more you remember.

This does take a little effort but dreams can tell you so much about yourself that you didn't know. Dream Jouraling a fun and unique hobbie that is worth a try!

♥,
Vanessa


Monday, August 3, 2015

Childhood As A 90s Kid

Just a sneak peek into what my childhood looked like. Also, sorry about the off white background, I don't know if it bothers you as much as it bothers me but, just bare with me. 



This here is my pet rooster, Gallo. Gallo means rooster in Spanish, gosh, I was original. 
This rooster was the sweetest, it thought that I was it's mom.


My sister and I at the Zoo and at the beach. We were close from the start. 


Birthday parties as a kid. I find it hilarious that we actually wore birthday hats.


Oh look at that, it gets even better. I was older in this birthday picture, but the balloon hats were key.


Here is my mom and me on a trolley in San Francisco. 


My dads birthday, I think he was turning 42.
Below is a class Christmas party, I miss those. 


Halloween! Here is my friend Taylor and me about to go knock on someones door. I'm the pumpkin. 


Overalls and flannel. Who knew those would come back into style.

Hope you enjoyed taking a look at these pictures! 
<3,
Vanessa

Friday, July 31, 2015

Elly's Summer Photo Contest

A Girl Photo Contest

To enter Elly's photo contest click on the button or click here. You must enter before August 1st! 

Saturday, July 25, 2015

Rain Droplets.

Rain, at last! It has been a while since it's rained here in Oregon and I am ecstatic to smell, feel, and see rain! This morning when I woke up, which was around 8:00 am I felt that it was colder than normal. Looking out my window, I found that the ground was damp and tree's leaves had droplets of rain scattered on them. Before I went running I found this rose outside of my house, I grabbed my camera, then took pictures of this beauty. 



Wednesday, July 22, 2015

I Love Our Blogging Community

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Yes, YOU, the person reading, thinking, and commenting on my blog, thank you for taking the time to read and share your thoughts with me.

I have been a part of the blogging community for about three years and I can not explain how much I appreciate the blogging community. Never, in the three years I've had this blog, have I received a negative comment on a post. In today's society, it is hard to steer clear of people's negativity and put-downs but, blogger is different, the people are different.

Blogger is different in every good way possible. The girls in the blogging community are truly wonderful! I consider each one of you my friends. I've shared a lot of my thoughts on here and I have always felt safe doing so. That's because of how I have never had anyone be negative towards me and that you girls also share your lives with others and me on blogger.

Just wanted to give a quick shout out to all of you wonderful girls! The girls who help me get through life by reading my posts, thank you!

As I was writing this I thought of making this into some kind of award/button to put on your sidebar to show everyone how much we love them! I don't know how this would work yet, but I wanted to know if you girls would be interested in that before I start putting my thoughts into action. 

Again, Thank you!

Love,
Vanessa

Sunday, July 19, 2015

When Life Gives You Lemons

There are times in life where we feel like we have reached rock bottom, and I know from experience that it's hard to deal with everything going on. It could be a bad day, a horrible few weeks, or losing someone close to you can have you feeling down. However, there are things you can do to add some joy back into life. Here are 10 things that will help you be happier.

1. Dance- Dancing allows you to be free and only think about the next step, music, and how silly you could be looking. Turn your favorite song on and get off that couch! 

2. Get together with your friends- Friends are what are going to get you through the hard times in life, run to them when you need cheering up. You don't even have to talk about what's going on but just being around them, I guarantee, will make you feel better. 

3. Blog vent- I know you don't want to fill up your feed with your feelings but, this works for a lot of people. Open up a post and start spilling out your feelings, you don't even have to post it, just write about what is going on. 

4. Go to the beach- The beach has these things call positive ions in the air which make breathing a lot better, and when breathing is better, you feel a lot better. Plus, getting away from the city and some pretty scenery always helps! 

5. Read a book- Reading lets your mind go into another world and take a break from the one you're always in. Along For the Ride, by Sara Dessen is a book I'd read. 

6. Bubble Bath- This is a classic move to take if you need to relax. Wash away the negativity. 

7. Run/ Working Out- Running has done wonders for when I'm in a bad position in life. I run till I can't, or until I have no more negative thoughts. Working out is good for you mentally and physically.

8. Taking pictures- Seeing the world in a different perspective can be very effective, which is why photography is magnificent. 

9. Breath- This is an effortless way to feel better within seconds. Take at least five deep breaths with your eyes closed. 

10 Make blueberry Lemon-Aid- Blueberry lemon-aid is what inspired this post. I was making it and thought of the quote, " When life gives you lemons" and immediately I thought of a bad day, and ways to make a bad day a better one. Making something yummy is the way to do that. 


This is the blueberry lemon-aid that I made. The recipe for this is here Instead of cooking the blueberries I strained them, and warmed the pulp, sugar, and lemon in a bowl in the microwave. 

Cheer up! <3
Vanessa

Friday, July 17, 2015

Blog Disaster

If you haven't noticed over the past few weeks I've been changing my blog design a lot. At first, I thought I'd be cute to have my blog title look like mail and the posts as the letters. That didn't last to long.

Then I thought about changing the my blog to have a more summer look. That's what's up at the current moment. A splash of summer is what my blog header looks like. After a few weeks with the blog like this I feel as if I need to change it again. I just can't settle with this look, doesn't look/ feel like me.

My first header was simple and girly. That's what I now want for my future design. Something girly and simple, but not to sparkly.

I should be getting to work on it tomorrow morning but I wanted to know what sites you girls use to make your headers. I'm using pic monkey now but j was wondering what other sites you use, as well as tips!

Thanks!
Vanessa

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Dream Journaling

Something I use to do as a child was dream journal. I have a notebook filled with dreams from my 5-7th-grade self. It started when a friend and I had a very similar dream on the same night about a certain someone falling off a building in a wheelchair (this was in the 5th grade) From then on we decided that we would write down our dreams so we found notebooks and started writing down our dreams night after night. After the year was up we both decided to keep dream journaling, I'm pretty sure I stuck with it longer. Dream journaling was just my thing. It was unique and fun.

I found my dream journal a few months ago and decided I'd start doing it again. I got off track due to going to school, but I'm hoping this time I can keep it up. I'd like to experience a lucid dream at least once in my life and journaling is the way to get there. Wish me luck in filling another book.
<3 <3,
Vanessa

Weekend 4

Friday July, 10th:
Friends and Food. These are two very important things to have in life but, when combined together it can be dangerous. My friend Jamie and Tania were getting together and I was invited to come make food with them. We ended up making mini apple pies, smore cupcakes, and a potato stuffed with cheese and bacon. At the time, it seemed like it might be possible to get diabetes and gain a few pounds. We had lots of fun cooking, which made things entirely worth it. Plus what better was to start to weekend then a bake-off?

Saturday, July, 11th:
Another day of selling blueberries! Saturday was a very enjoyable day to sell berries. The weather was cold enough that it wasn't painful to wear warmer clothes. Lauren and I spent a lot of time together telling people wear to pick and who to ask for help, that is if they need it. We were there for a few hours and a few hours with Sara. When we were saying goodbye to her she didn't let go of my sisters hand. I think she wanted us to stay longer, but we needed to give her family a chance to be with her.
I'm not sure what I did the rest of this day, for some reason this week and weekend has been foggy.

Sunday: July, 12th:
At 12;15 until 1:15 I was in Church connecting with God and learning more about how to become a better person. The homily was based off love and how we need to know what love is, love yourself and be kind to others before we can truly love life. Good points but I had a rough morning making it hard to fully follow what was being said.
I got my hair cut after. I can't explain how much I hate getting my hair cut. I have always thought it was a drag to get your hair cut. I pay a lot of money for them to fix the ends of my hair and in return I have to listen to the ladies talk pointless things. Plus, I'm always kinda worried they'll cut my hair the wrong way. UGH but that's done with for the next few months.

Saturday, July 11, 2015

Memories: My sister's stitches

Something I bother my sister about all the time is the scar she has on her left eyebrow. It's not as bad as it sounds, the scar is small and hidden by eyebrow hair, but the story is quite funny. 

She was in 3rd grade, I was in 7th and it was probably spring. We decided that we would go to the park with our friend Taylor and our dog. Taylor is one of my oldest friends, we've known each other since we were two.
Anyways, we went to the park and my sister, Lauren, rode her bike there. When we got to the park Taylor and I went to the playground and Lauren rode around on her bike with the dog. I don't know how this happened but one minute my sister is on her bike holding the dogs leash and the next shes on the floor next to a tether ball pole. Taylor and I both run over to Lauren who's got blood on her face and is crying. We decided to leave the bike at the park, ditch the shoes and rush my sister back home before she drowns in blood. (Okay, so it wasn't that bloody but as little kids it looked like she might die.) So, here we are Taylor and me waking my sister to our house with one of us with no shoes. I can't remember who didn't have shoes on I know someone did.
Alright, so how did my sister mange to hurt herself? Well, as she tells it, she was riding her bike and looked back at Aluchi, our dog, following her behind and when she looked forward again there was a tether pole coming for her face. What I don't understand is how you end up getting 4 stitches because you bumped into a ROUND tether pole. How does that happen?! This is the thing I bother her about to this day. Getting stitches because you were stupid enough to crash into a round tether pole. I think it's just a sister thing that makes it obligatory to bother her about this silly incident. 

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Appreciating People

Recently, I got news that someone I care a lot about thinks they aren't going to be with us for much longer. This person has put a lot of faith and will in recovering; she's believed in the people who have strived to help her recover for over a year. Unfortunately, she's starting to lose faith in the idea of recovery and starting to accept the concept of afterlife. It hurts to know she might not be with us for much longer, but I know she will be in peace when she's not here. 

All of this got me thinking about how many of us don't appreciate the people around us as much as we can. We all care for one another, that's for sure, but how often do we really show true compassion, empathy, care, kindness, and love? Humans, I believe, are really self-centered. In today's world, it almost seems impossible to focus on others and not think of yourself. So much of our world is revolved around us and I think that it's time we start showing others how much we care before we no longer can. 

Everyone needs to know they are important to someone, from your family to a classmate, they all need love. Now, I'm not talking about being overly nice to them 24/7, I'm talking about doing small things for someone to make them feel important. This could be as little as listening to them (with your phone put away) while they talk to you, helping them with something, and giving them love. My point is that we need to show people they matter to us and that we love them before it's too late. 

Enjoy every moment you have with someone you care about. 

Vanessa 

Monday, July 6, 2015

Week 3

Wednesday July 1st:
I started getting to work at 7 in the morning which means I have to be up at 6. At 6 am I tend to wake up questioning why I choose to work during summer (it's hot outside, gardening in the sun's hard, the early hours, and people) Crazy idea I had. The one thing I do like is being able to unwind for a few hours. I sound very down to earth right now.... MOVING ON
After work, I took the Trimet home and just hung out with my sister for a few hours until it was time to paddle. Padding, as usual, was great. My favorite way to end the day.

Thursday the 2nd:
My sister and I needed to spend more time together and since our mom was out of the house, we decided we would turn on some music and dance. Somehow, we ended up seeing who could dance the longest without stopping. I'm not talking about stepping back and forth from side to side, I'm talking about full-on jumping, spinning, leaping, and more. We were crazy for a whole 15 minutes until Lauren stopped dancing. She still has to have an egg cracked on her head.

Friday the 3rd:
Blueberries! 2nd week opening and we were picked out in 30 minutes. This is a huge blueberry field but due to all the people that came to pick, what would have been an hour and 30 minutes, became 30. Let me tell you, costumers are not happy when they hear "Oh I am sorry but we are picked out... there are no more berries to pick." I felt bad each time I said that but it was the truth and they could see it.

4th of July;
My sister and I took the Trimet to the airport at around 1:30 pm after I went on a 3-mile run. I have no time to run anymore. We hoped on the train after seeing a few people we knew. The ride to the airport, where our dad was picking us up, went smoothly. No crazy people throwing fruit, that's something that happened on the train a few weeks ago while I was riding. After a long 50 minutes, we got to the airport and hopped in the car to Washington. We spent the night at my dads and saw the fireworks with his girl friend and her son.
The fourth of July festival was great. Lots of music to dance to (definitely Lauren and I's thing) We danced to a few songs and some very random rock bands. It was just a great night with my sister, dad, and his girl friend. (Going to need to edit this but for now it's ALL GOOD)






<3,
Vanessa

Monday, June 29, 2015

Weekend 2

Saturday, 27th:
There's a reason you don't wear shorts when you work on a blueberry field. Shorts don't cover your legs, causing someone, like me, to get many scratches. Unfortunately, me being me, I didn't remember this one little bit of info and ended up getting many scratches. It's almost as if the blueberry branches are alive as they try to grab you when you're leading a customer to a bush.
All Saturday this is what I was doing. Greeting people with a friendly smile and showing them where to pick. This is something I have been doing since I was about 14. When I first started helping out at Sara's I had to carry a stick with a rainbow wind catcher so that customers could find me. I was quite short. Now, being 18, I walk and talk confidently to everyone that comes to pick our berries. I am blessed to be able to help Sara.

Sunday, 28th:
Nothing like waking up at 5:30 am to get in the car at 6:30 am to be in Salem at 7:30 am all to race some dragons. Worlds Beat was Sunday, boy was that crazy! Dragon boating, in general, is just really crazy. From the people to the sport. Seriously, what sport decides that racing bright and early is a good idea? If it were my choice, I wouldn't allow sleep deprived paddlers and steersmen to be on a boat that early, who knows what might happen. I mean this is probably the reason there is always one ambulance, attending one paddler each year at this race.  Races went well, we had about 20 high school students and about 4 adults come race with us. We were the only group with high schoolers, but boy did we show those adults. We won first, long story short.






Paddle Paddle,
Vanessa

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